this morning i went out to breakfast with my friend Mornin'Spider in oakland at noon. i needed some hash browns mixed with scrambled eggs and ketchup and that's all there was to it.
none of my diet rules are engaged at this time*.
we had to split the tab at the end on two visas. the total was $20. including tax. it's humorous that two 40 year olds would have to split a $20 breakfast bill in half with two visas. then i said, well, it's 2009, what the hell.
she agreed.
people at the cafe:
1. damon albarn/liam gallagher in mirrored aviators served us. i mean, the guy held himself like a rockstar more than he looked like damon/liam...mirrored aviators, a cafe tshirt that's a bit too small, saggy, worn-out jeans. tall, handsome. surprised that he was cordial. expected douchey.
2. woman who doesn't know her belly is huge and sticking out over her waistband and wrapped in a too-tight tshirt. jesus. she had nice lips, and she talked constantly so i noticed. but she also possessed an insecurity that created a gross, light green cloud around her. like you might choke if you got too close. like smog. she had an annoyingly habitual huh-huh-huh laugh. her "date" was also gross. longish stringy hair, look of fear in his eyes, no idea what to do with himself, he sat there with his stringy hair and some of it in a tiny, skinny, oily ponytail.
depressing.
3. and then another mirrored-aviator damon/liam shows up. can't tell if he's the same person except the clothes are different. he's wearing a long-sleeved black tshirt and gray jeans that are a little tighter the other damon/liam. same haircut as the other damon/liam. couldn't tell these two dudes apart until i saw them both at the same time. i think this might be the new ironic hipster look. they didn't even look that much younger than me. martha stewart!**
4. two sets of dorky overweight couples wishing they were thinner and not really feeling like they fit. in their clothes or in the bay area.
5. me. i fit alright. i've got the stringy hair i haven't washed in two days. i put it in braids and barret my bangs up, pull a few extra strands out and put on lip gloss. i convince myself this makes me ok to look at. but when i get in front of a mirror, i see someone who's been rid. i don't give a martha stewart** about this at the cafe. that's the nicest thing i can say about the east bay and the city versus marin county. i could never go out looking that way in marin. i might not get served and i would definitely get dirty - haha - looks.
bad, ugly, beautiful, free, constrained. which do you choose and why?
6. my friend. she fits fine. she was born in that cafe. she is pretty without trying and always clean. she doesn't get stringy hair. sometimes she can pull a nolte*** but she'd never go out half-cocked nolte like i did today.
"all the lonely people. where do they all come from."
the song is not in my head, but the words are.
i want to throw up over how many lonely people there are, and gross people and desperate people. all the people. it's nauseating.
*at this time = unmentionable loss.
**martha stewart! is a funny new curse term in boston as reported by my friend TC. i'm going to try it instead of "fuck" all the time. fuck can get ugly. i've got enough ugly right now.
***lookin' nolte is when you wake up looking like nick nolte's mug shot.
No comments:
Post a Comment