Kissing Ball

A little production change from work i found amusing:

A Gift from Gavin

Street Boner 330

"Music nerds may hate her, but Yoko Ono was the first one to tell pants they can go fuck themselves. That changed things forever.

********** – a perfect 10"

Introducing Harriet Eyeball

she's 5lbs. she's got one working yellow eye. she is gaining weight and will be gorgeous soon. we are chronicling her progress...

so far i'd say she's gained at least half a pound since she came into our lives.

her meow is outrageously loud and scratchy. she's a total beggar, but who can blame a little starving cat? she'll learn.

she'll learn that she'll never starve again.
she'll learn that she always has a warm bed to sleep in if she wants it.
she'll learn that she's scored the big cat score of all time.
because The Yeti told her while she dreamt.

Guy and Lou face off in iChat debate: Heath Ledger and Batman

* = lou
marco polo = guy

Lyrics Sites Suck, and oh, Remember when River died?

somebody needs to make a nice, helpful, useful, organized, non-bannerized, good-looking, smart lyrics site.

look at this $#@^! there are so many ads on every site and they're always just ass-ugly. the setup is gross and they've all copied each other. current available lyrics sites put you completely out of the mood to read lyrics.

somebody?

ok, so back to what i was doing. looking up lyrics for L7's Talk Box because i believe donita sparks to have written it about the night river phoenix died. P-the band was playing that night and i know she loves the butthole surfers. i'm a mad speculator. i wrote to her once asking her. she did not respond.

an excerpt:
Last night I had a dream
It scared the shit out of me
’cause you were dying
Yeah you were dying

And everyone was around
And you were on the ground
And everyone was around

Dying, you were dying...

And you were all alone you were all alone
You were by a phone
But you were all alone...

And your friends were there
And all your friends were there
In your underwear
And all your friends were there
And you were dying


as if anyone doesn't remember that night (right)...river stumbled out of the viper room during P's set. he started barfing. he was leaning up against a pay phone. his brother called 911. river had convulsions on the sidewalk. barf spewed everywhere. people gathered all around watching while his brother freaked out to the operator. then river convulsed some more and then he died.

it was awful. i guess i saw this on the news...

The Cat Stays In The Picture

I've always been this way. when spaz gave birth to four male kittens in my 15th year, i chose one and named him "Ed." Ed was never going anywhere. this was never discussed or argued nor the subject even broached by my unrelentingly strict parents. sister N's choice kitten was given away and sister B was too young to choose one.

Ed was my buddy. i had no friends left at school. my parents had successfully eradicated all my social efforts that started in 2nd grade - through a steady series of "grounding" - so Ed's birth seriously gave me hope that i might make it out alive.

Ed went nowhere. Ed stayed for 15 years until he died of liver failure in 1999. i hope the new little harriet miller, aka harry eyeball, aka the New Yeti stays as long.

(please.)

Tao Te Cat

Evil opposite universe Clementine

"Lou. Come here."

it was his tone that actually made me close my laptop and get up off the deep-seated sofa.

guy had the sliding glass doors open and was very carefully peering out at a little black cat head. the little black cat head was peering at us from around a deck post. the little black cat head looked at me and meowed a horrible, coarse, hurty meow.

"That's not clementine is it."

i peered at her. i stared. my heart rate picked up. it looked just like her, but smaller. and with only one working yellow eye and a voice like sandpaper.

"No. No. It's not clem...hey sweetheart..."

she came to me. i rubbed my hand over her back and felt every single vertebrae. my hand moved down to her tail where i could feel her pelvis in a way that is completely impossible in a healthy cat. her shoulder bones stick out. she has fur loss on her legs. she has very short whiskers. not sure if this is due to youth or malnutrition.

"MEOWWWW." her sandpaper voice was so loud, and for such a young cat, that it suggested she could be slightly deaf.

"MEOWWW."

i gave her some more pets while guy looked on, just as entranced. clementine was nowhere around. loud blind kitty had our full attention. i immediately poured her a huge bowl of food. after realizing that was she was also missing teeth, i defrosted some trader joe's turkey balls and cut them up very small. she ate two turkey balls and about two cups of hard food. and drank tons of water. and walked right into the house. even upstairs.

i already love her. guy might too, since she isn't afraid of him. she is identical to clementine if we lived in an evil opposite universe that would let a clementine starve to death.

plans for a doctor visit, flea medicine and whatever she needs have been made. i made her a soft bed of towels outside and showed it to her. she knew what i was talking about. she slept on it a bit.

but she was not at the door this morning.

we both hope she comes back tonight.

The Police get taken down a notch

remember last year? the police touring was something to be simultaneously excited and embarrassed about. it was ostentatious and obtuse, it was pop incarnate, and it was huge. HUGE!! the entire oakland coliseum stadium was FILLED. budweisers ran ya $10!! i know this because i was there being a dumb 37-yr-old who had wished forever that she hadn't missed seeing the Police when Synchronicity came out and sting was cool.

how funny that they were just here again and i had no idea. maybe because they are now playing the "Sleeptrain Pavilion" in "Concord" (suburban hell) follwing "Kathy Griffin."

too funny. and sad.

Poem 3

written in 1999.

i don't understand what this means.
i know i'm sane
i know i'm insane
i know i'm smart
i know i'm stupid
i know i'm tolerant
i know i'm aggro
i don't understand what this means.

"I am not a bad girl!"

picking this up from boing boing, because it's just too funny not to.

For those of you about to (love fonts) I salute you

HP Lovecraft. don't know much about the guy. my friend in rhode island LOVES him and he's got great taste, so... one thing i can say, very nice fonts here based on his handwriting and other stuff (?).



inspiring.



REALLY inspiring.

Bop Lyrics by Allen Ginsberg

(bear with me kids. just as i promised not to write a women's health journal and become a goddess, i also pledge to not become a poet who is practicing her craft. but this one just had to be...)



When I think of death
I get a goofy feeling
then I catch my breath:
zero is appealing.
Appearances are hazy
Smart went crazy
Smart went crazy

A flower in my head
has fallen through my eye,
someday I'll be dead:
I love the Lord on high
I wish he'd pull my daisy
Smart went crazy
Smart went crazy

I asked the lady what's a rose
she kicked me out of bed
I asked the man and so it goes
he hit me on the head.
Nobody knows
Nobody knows
At least nobody's said.

All the doctors think I'm crazy
The truth is really that I'm lazy
I made visions to beguile 'em
till they put me in the asylum

I'm a pot and God's a potter,
and my head's a piece of putty.
Ark my darkness
lark my looks.
I'm so lucky to be nutty.

Poem 2

written in early 1991

my heart is strong
my eyes are weak
i love you so
i cannot speak
shove your foot down my throat
make me gag
notice the floor
no answers fell out.

Novel Morning

equation for a good morning, just in case it means something, just in case it can be duplicated.

1. wake up at 7:31, "ok!" exasperated. talking to alarm clock.

2. shower, regular.

3. outfit good. small white skirt fits now, fashion whole new outfit incl. bag

4. car. shuffle gives me this (plus about five skips):
a. mary-christ - listen to it twice - think maybe this is my fave sonic youth song
b. verse chorus verse - nirvana
c. monsieur valentine - spoon
d. 20 years in the dakota - hole
e. return of the rat - nirvana covering the wipers

5. get novel idea. about a novel.

Brokeback Grass

Poem 1

friend e told me to post more poems. he's a fan of the winning haiku. how nice. haven't thought about poetry in a long time, although the word "tome" is an accurate description of my junior high and high school collected works.

written yesterday...

there's a pocket of bile in my heart
it holds your words.

like licking a metal mountain covered in vitamin sprinkles:
the taste.
like soaking a pillow without a sound; doesn't that mean something...permanent.
like self-loathing that runs with horsepower blood, blazing vessel-trails;
torque.
like digging a rut and it never rains and then becomes a grave.
like meatloaf,
like melarky,
there is no truth in self-defense.
like the walkman kid on an excedrin overdose, filling in graph paper smiles.

i take your words and put them there, careful not to bend them.

Courtney Love can save us

i had an epiphany this morning.
how amazing would it be if courtney love could stand up and use her brains and be a leader in a women's movement. how great would it be if she could make a big difference in the world. she is strong enough to stand up to the toughest of the tough guys in politics. she is smart enough and experienced enough to know how to speak to different audiences. if she could get her shit together and rally herself she could accomplish a hundred thousand times more than angelina jolie's totally silent, whatever, refugee work. courtney could make a huge difference in the lives of women in the future, she could lead a movement that ensures the progression of women in the world - past voting privileges and the ability to abort one's child. with her gift of words and relentless debate she could move people to make a difference alongside her; at least get us all fair pay, at least get more women's medical research funded, at least stop republicans from taking office by using her superior brains and manipulation skills, maybe she could even ensure a third-party wins the vote. courtney love could stealthily inspire a youth rising-up, a youth that is done with apathy, a youth with the energy to topple the political leaders of our country, verbally punch them in the face and inspire people to never let up the way she never lets up. she could change things for women, and other humans, forever. courtney love is a woman who has accomplished everything she set out to do in life with horrible odds against her, and a whole world that hates her.

courtney for president. as soon as she gets out of 542-day rehab.

John Lurie is a Funny Man

very sad to come across news today that john lurie has "some kind" of lyme disease and can no longer make music or act in movies. he says he's been busy painting. His description of music in this interview sounds like the room i'm talking about sonic youth building for me.

M: Do you find painting as satisfying as making music?

JL: When music is perfect and the band is hovering above the stage and roaring forward with a ferocity and love that cannot be denied, then music can be beyond satisfying. I have never had the experience of visiting God’s house for a little while with painting.



i hope i get his book for my birthday...and a print someday.

Pieces of Mind

know what this is? it's pure unadulterated un-copied 100% real Klonopin. look at all the work they put into designing this pill. that means goodness. yummy yummy goodness.

you don't know how beautiful a pill with a "K" punched through it is, until you've lost your miiiiiiiind. no kiddin'.

Life Joke

Cat Joke