This is a letter to the people,
People.
Stop using evites. They are rude (a guest list everyone can see?). They are insensitive to the person the party is for (an ever-changing RSVP list the guest of honor is privvy to???). They are a sign of outright laziness and lack of creativity (and not the kind that makes beautiful paintings, but the kind that solves problems).
They are clearly a mistake of the modern age and they need to end.
Thank you,
person who is going to hold on to past ideals until her crooked, cold hands are pried apart postmortem.
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