Last day first: A New Year's Eve in Bangkok

new year's eve. we have 8 hours in bangkok for a layover between Bali and home. we get a hotel room because the hours there are from 8pm to 4am. we check in, shower, get dressed and go out to a place that our cab has passed on the way to the hotel. it is this tiny street about 15 feet wide and maybe 2 blocks long. more like 1.5. it's filled with neon signs. FILLED. like all of vegas is packed in this tiny space. we can't resist it, so when we're ready we head back. turns out the name of the street is "Cowboy 2." for no particular reason. after a lot of funny miscommunication we find out there were not actual cowboys there.

upon arrival we start walking and meld into a huge street party with most participants inside. the place is filled with go-go bars. prostitutes everywhere. but they're so good looking, and so not hagged out, that it's not a terribly gross scene like it would be here. there aren't really any drugs in thailand. at least not used by women, which is probably why they don't look grosser. anyway, the bars are all open in the front, and food has been put out throughout the night, people are pretty wasted. it's 11:15pm. almost midnight. we pick a bar and get a drink and sit outside and watch for a while before going inside. these aren't nude bars, but almost. in the bar we pick, there are girls pole-dancing on an elevated platform in tiny bikinis. they are the worst dancers i've ever seen because they just don't care. they are like half-asleep dancing. it's depressing. it's not titillating in the slightest although they are very beautiful, they're like lazy and bored. we get two shots of vodka and 2 beers. there is a live band, which is why we chose this particular bar. they are playing heavy rock standards. i think there was joe satriani first and the girls could not dance to that at all. it made them even more bored. then some led zeppelin was played and they picked up a bit.

we get another round. it's kind of fun in the bar. the bartenders are women and they are really nice (well, all the thai people are super nice) and are the less attractive women, which is obviously why they're serving liquor. by the second shot, i realize i'm drinking smirnoff vodka which reminds me of 6th street, which makes me want to vomit just at the sight of the label. i tell guy, "Ew! it's smirnoff!" he says that's what we've been drinking all along. that disgusts me. i finish my beer.

by this time it's almost midnight and guy orders another round of shots and beers. we're handed some poppers for the countdown. we do our shots, take a sip of beer, and..."4321 HAPPY NEW YEAR!!" whooo! the place erupts and silly string is everywhere. we kiss and cheer. what a surreal experience. where am i? how did i get here? what is this?!! then, i suddenly throw up in my mouth. i am so far from the bathroom, and would have to go through so many people, that i don't even try to make it. i barf another round into my mouth. at this point i have to swallow it. it's hot and burn-y and gross. but i do it. breathe in. breathe out. sit. start to sweat. ooops...ahh...here comes more. i barf two more times, two more mouthfulls, and swallow. this is so horrible. guy is looking at me like "what is that face all about?" i tell him. he points to the bathroom. i go. by the time i get there. there is no more barf. i have swallowed all of it, and it doesn't need to get out. great.

i go back downstairs and ask guy if we can sit outside. we take our drinks and find a table on the street. people are stumbling everywhere. it's a madhouse. big fat old american men with teeny tiny pretty thai women. it's so gross. and fascinating too. guy suddenly points across the street at a tall, white girl who has her hands up to her face. she is obviously bawling. she is so sad. guy says, "i'm going to go talk to her." i push him back down, look at her and say, "no, she needs a girl to talk to." i can tell she is just so sad, and reminds me of myself on many a new year's eve, heartbroken that some dude doesn't love me enough to be with me, to kiss me at midnight. guy encourages me to go talk to her. i don't want to. i'm hesitant. i never invite strangers into my life. but i look at her, and i tell myself to just be nice. just do it. i get up and walk towards her.

when i reach her, i say, "hi, are you alright? um, i'm american, are you?" with this, she looks up and her face is streaked with tears and she nods. i say, "i'm from california. ummm..." and she says, "minnesota." i tell her i am with my husband across the street and we're just drinking beers. would she like one? would she like someone to hang out with? she says, "yes." and follows me to our table.

her story is this: she met a guy online and they've been dating for 4 months, but he moved to bangkok a month ago. he's a teacher. he's in a bar right now with his friend. she doesn't care about go-go dancing and can't understand why he would invite her all the way to bangkok for new year's eve, then bring her here, then leave her to go watch a show at midnight. "What a DICK." i say. "What a DICK move." she nods. she is feeling better. we give her a beer and start to talk. she is a nurse and travels around the east coast from hospital to hospital. she thinks it's a boring job. she thinks my job, writing, is cool. i tell her i used to be a designer. she thinks it's so cool that being an artist means you can be many things, but she can only be a nurse. she is 28 years old and her name is the same as my youngest sister. she is sweet. she almost looks like a model on America's Next Top Model. those girls are pretty, but not gorgeous. intermittently she cries. then she sees her boyfriend come out of the bar and he joins her at our table. he won't look at us. i hate him. finally she gets up and goes. she thanks us for being so nice. as she walks away, she says, "hey, are you on Facebook?" i hate facebook, and while i am "on" it, i don't even know my screen name. she asks what it is, i take a stab at it. she's being pulled away, i can't even tell if she heard me.

guy and i sit a bit longer and then go back to the hotel. we have 1.5 hours before our wake-up call. we lay down and pass out immediately. when the wake-up call comes, my head feels like a cement block.

and then we fly home.