I said "Yes."

last night, after we arrived in louisiana and had a couple of drinks to calm our fried plane nerves...

guy played a trick on me.

he'd been telling me for weeks, that my christmas gift had to be opened in louisiana and it was made up of many different components. for weeks he would get home late from work saying he had to go pick up a component, check on a component, get a component shipped to our hotel, etc. etc. he even bought me some kick-ass new boots, kd lang would be proud of, to open on christmas eve with my parents at their house in carson city. he played me. he played me good.

so last night, after getting a drink and going back to our room, guy said i had to face the window while he arranged all the components on the bed so i could see them all at once. i told him i'd have to sit, my back was achy, you know...while i faced the window he made a lot of "fiddling" noise, knocking stuff around. i really had no idea what he could put together to make one present, what the theme could be, what this was all about. i'd been trying to figure it out for weeks and had come to no conclusions at all. i even found a clue, i found the words "september birth stone" left in the google search bar on his laptop, but considered receiving jewelry so preposterous, i put the idea out of my head and completely forgot about it.

when he was done fiddling, he told me to stand up first and then turn around. i did so and, sitting at my feet, on his knees, was guy and he was crying and he was holding a box out at me and he said, "will you marry me?" and then he stood up and we held each other, and yes, CRIED AND CRIED and i said yes!! yes! and we held each other for a long time and then there was a knock at the door. i was just shocked. shocked, i can't tell you, i was floored. and guy got the door and it was a man holding champagne glasses and a bottle and some chocolate and strawberries, clearly the "romance package." and we drank champagne and he told me that all of his friends knew, and all of his family, except him mom and even one of my dearest friends, W. knew and then he told me that he had already told my parents. he said he told them that he was going to ask me to marry him and did he have their blessings. he said my mom grabbed him and hugged him and cried and cried, saying yes, yes, and my dad gave him an awkward hug and then backed off and gave him a big "Thumb's Up!!" and that they were very happy and said yes, he has their blessings.

then he asked me to call his mom. i woke her up from her cold maryland slumber. i said, sarah? sarah? your son proposed to me. and she cried and i cried some more and she told me loved me so much and she was so happy.

i feel undeserving. and scared and excited and empowered more than anything. i feel like we have just joined forces to created an unstoppable force. i am filled with hope and excitement for what will most certainly be an outstanding future. i feel we will have a HUGE future. together we are gigantic. is that what kim deal was singing about?

"gigantic gigantic gigantic
a big big love."