yesterday i killed a spider with my blowdryer.
today i'm feeling really guilty.
i'm an arachnophobe.
i don't usually feel guilty for killing spiders. they get in my space. they crawl on me. they scare the crap out of me. they should stay in their spaces, but they don't always know where those spaces end and my begin, i suppose.
yesterday i inflicted torture and there is no excuse for that.
when i came into the bathroom this morning to get ready, the spider was still hanging there.
i think the heat melted his daddy longlegs. some were broken off. he was hanging all cockeyed.
i immediately started feeling his pain. what the fuck have i done? how i could be so mean? who am i to do this to another living creature?!
i saw the yeti in his posture. broken and struggling.
so i grabbed him with a tissue to clean him up and throw him in the toilet and put him out of his misery, when he started to move. very slowly. he was still trying to live. his legs were all over the place, broken and bent and he was still trying to live.
i don't know how i can forgive myself.
i will never do it again.
1 comment:
Oh, B...that's such a sad thing. When you attempt to kill something, but somehow hesitate at the last second, and the creature is still trying to live. It's pathetic. Makes me tear up. Gawd...now I'm depressed. I don't kill anything except ants (and I apologize before I do it), and flies (no apologies there). I hate those flying bastards!
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